Wedding Tips & Advice

The thorny subject of RSVPs

The beautifully designed and embossed wedding invitations have left your desk (be it via slow mail, email or FB) and tacked onto the bottom, as with most invitations, is the RSVP. Simple, done and dusted. Now all you have to do is sit back and wait for responses, right?

Afraid not. Almost every bride I know is busy laughing right now. Those who are currently awaiting responses are almost crying in frustration, whilst those of us who’ve been there and done that are pretty scornful, and just a little curious to see whether or not your guests will répondez s’il vous plaît, which is a gorgeous French phrase for ‘respond, if you please.’

And it’s the ‘if you please’ part that seems to be the bit that friends and family take to heart. I have reached the conclusion that most people are like the wonderful man to whom I am married (thought I’d just get that in before the next bit) who is a perpetual non-RSVPer, or at least a procrastinator of note.

Surely, one glance at the date of the wedding will tell such individuals that they can or can’t make it? Then all they have to do is hit the ‘reply’ button (if it’s an email) or scratch in the details on the RSVP card (brides have started providing these postcards with stamp affixed they want to make it that easy for you) and reply.

The reason that brides are making it so easy, is that, believe it or not, they don’t have the time to send out repeated messages, letters, emails asking you if you can make the date. And they don’t want to have to. She knows you’re busy. But then, so is she – she’s got a wedding to organise, remember!

Bottom line for the brides out there: you have to know how many people to cater for. This means, despite the irritation factor, you’ll just have to have to make a few phone calls to those guests on the list who haven’t yet responded. Set the time aside, and make the calls, rather than stew in irritation.

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