This week Lauren shares some of her thoughts about mom’s and your wedding. Perhaps some of your out there can relate to what she is telling us this week …
She is the one person more excited than you
So whilst your fiancé is still recovering from proposing and asking your father for your hand in marriage, you are excitedly planning the wedding at the speed of light. While I was ecstatic by the thought of choosing my processional song and shopping for wedding décor, I didn’t realise that my zealousness could not hold a candle to that of my moms.
As her only daughter, this is the day she has been waiting for, for who knows how long and now she finally has the chance to proudly show the world and my massive family that I’m to be married.
If she’s a perfectionist, run for the hills
And by hills, I mean a tropical island. My mom (bless her heart) is the most organised person I know. Before I’ve ever had a chance to, she’s always had the solution to every problem and thinks well ahead in preparation for anything that may come our way.
I feel she would make a splendid events planner as she has a wonderful eye for style, classic taste and ensures everything is orchestrated to the tee. Now that it’s my wedding, her need for perfection and attention to detail simultaneously scares me and makes me feel secure. This brings me to my next point…
You will butt heads
In her need to plan with you, pick out shades of fabric and decide what hairstyle has always looked best on you, you’ll have your disagreements. I have chatted to friends and cousins alike who despite having great relationships with their moms, all have an argument or two with regards to the pending nuptials.
You are two very different people with your own tastes, preferences and ideas. It happens. What’s important is that you find a way to deal with it and move on. Remind her that it’s YOUR wedding, she’s had hers. Listen to her suggestions and welcome her input.
If you still live at home, you’ll be smart and allocate one day a week to discuss wedding things. This leaves the rest of the week to remind yourself that you too will have a daughter one day and that you’d love her to include you in her plans.
This is a special time for her, allow her to reminisce.
All this wedding prep will bring up a lot of beautiful memories of her special day. It is a great time for you two to bond over lantern shopping and dress fittings. When my mom fished her wedding dress out from the depths of the cupboard, I sat back and enjoyed her parading around with it held up in front of her on a hangar.
She spoke of her pretty flowers, her veil which all sisters wore and her trousseau. It really is up to you whether you decide to wear the family veil or the beaded flower headband that your gran wore on her wedding day. But whatever you decide, enjoy walking beside her down memory lane.
Read more from Lauren as she plans her wedding in our Bride to Be section.
Photograph courtesy of Lauren Manuel ©
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Happy Wedding Planning!