Questions To Ask Your Minister / Priest Before A Wedding

posted on 2 May 2012 by The Tie The Knot Team
posted to Wedding Tips & Advice

talking-to-minister

It might be helpful to first look at the difference between priests, vicars, pastors and ministers – it can get a little confusing, especially for those  of us who are not frequent visitors to church, who choose a church for its aesthetic value, or because it’s convenient.

A pastor – a priest in charge of a parish; priests who are recently ordained tend to start as associate pastors.

A minister – in Christian churches a minister is authorised by a church to perform functions such as teaching of beliefs, leading services such as weddings and funerals and providing spiritual guidance.

A priest – authorised to perform the sacred rites of a religion.

A vicar – is a deputy or substitute. In the Anglican church a vicar is a type of parish priest; in the Roman Catholic church a vicar is a bishop or priest who heads a church not yet a full diocese.

Questions you might want to ask your minister:

  • Can we marry in your church? Sounds pretty obvious, but if you’re not catholic or haven’t been confirmed, some churches will not marry you. Other churches may operate a parish jurisdiction – if you don’t live nearby you can’t marry; and yet others expect you to have attended church for at least six months
  • Who will marry us? It may well depend on the date of your wedding as to who is most likely to marry you. If it’s a busy church, the priests divide up the various ceremonies between them
  • How much will it cost? Each church has a different fee attached to a wedding and you need to possibly include a choir, an organist or even bell ringers
  • Do we need to decorate the church? Not always necessary, as often the church has weekly flowers for services, but it’s good to know beforehand
  • What does the minister need from you? A lot of churches expect you to undergo a marriage preparation course, there is the rehearsal to organise, you might need to choose the humns and readings, and you may need to supply certain documents like your ID

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