Lauren’s Bridal Diary: 3 Questions I Have On Wedding Planning

posted on 7 September 2012 by The Tie The Knot Team
posted to Bride To Be, Lauren

registry-planning

So you would imagine that a bridal blog would be filled with great advice, helpful tips and funny stories of couples trying to plan their pending matrimony and lives together.  Whilst I love to share some of the gems I’ve picked up along the way, I think it’s time the tables are turned and I ask the questions I really want to.

Newlyweds, wives, husbands and engaged folk, feel free to reply with your honest answers and thoughts.  I have no doubt that many before me have asked these same questions.

How involved should your groom be?

For bride-to-be’s,  I bet you didn’t even realise you were doing most of the planning until your beloved repeats a joke about “just having to rock up.” And I’m sure there really isn’t a once size fits all situation here.  If your man has never been a planner, this spark is not suddenly going to ignite. If you are the main organiser who plans your social calendar and remembers all the birthdays, anniversaries and gifts to purchase, he is not likely to morph into the head organiser who takes notes, remembers invitation deadlines and various shades of coral.

But in many cases, guys like some direction and instruction. My fiancé wanted to help, but claimed he needed a list. So upon ticking off the first item of the list, he merrily informed me one task was complete. To remember the 101 things you’ve already accomplished up until now will not do you any good. Smile, pat him on the back and encourage him in the direction of task two. You’ll all be pleased to know that he is fully on planning wagon and fully he believes he is the best invitation designer and gift registry shopper.

Why are wedding shoes white?

Well of course you don’t HAVE to wear white strappy sandals to your wedding, but you may as well have to as there aren’t any bridal boutiques who stock them in any other colour. They only seem to come in dainty varieties with beads and rather scary adornments. Power to those of you who like them, but I have seen about three white pairs of shoes that I can actually stomach.

And this is after reading a lot of bridal magazines and browsed ample stores. So I’m going with non-wedding shoes. Anything that pops with colour, is comfortable and won’t cripple me four hours into our wedding. Sexy is important, but you don’t want to be limping before you’ve even had your first dance. Plus you don’t want to be sinking into the grass with your stilettos .

What are the essentials for your gift registry?

What fun to walk around home stores envisioning what you’d like your future home to look like. People prioritize different things. While my fiancé is adamant we cannot do without a stick blender, I’m pretty there are other kitchen items ranking way higher in priority. What is acceptable to put on the wedding registry?

What is considered too expensive and do you really want to put a toilet brush on there? A married friend of ours gave us some helpful advice, she said that whilst we should put practical things on the list, adding your nice-to-haves is great too. The more extravagant items should also be added too as you never know what people are willing to bless you with on your special day. If not, then ok. But imagine you score a coffee machine…heaven.

Any thoughts you have on these questions, feel free to comment fervently.

Read more from Lauren as she plans her wedding in our Bride to Be section.

Photograph courtesy of Lauren Manuel © (photo taken while Lauren and Vaughan were planning their gift registry)

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Happy Wedding Planning!
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What Do You Think?


  1. 10 Sep 2012
    Lauren says

    HI Ladies

    Thank you so much for reading and taking time out to comment. Makes my writing experience that much sweeter. Thank you for your wonderful advice!

    Kelly: There will definitely be some wedding day pics!
    HI Daph, awesome, hope Tessa’s wedding plans are coming along beautifully.
    Christina, lucky lady with your musical man! I’m the one with the eye for detail, but there are many things I cannot bear to do, which my fiance has thankfully taken charge of :) I did some Latin, so I have a pair of gold ones. It’s a great idea! Think I may have found some wedges though, so we’ll see!

    Will keep you all posted! Thanks again…


  2. 8 Sep 2012
    Christina says

    I’m loving this blog and keeping in touch with your fantastic wedding planning time.

    My husband has an eye for detail, so as we planned our wedding that was the sort of thing he ended up being most involved in. Making a map to get from the church to the reception, spell-checking and formatting the hymn pamphlet. He also has many more years of music experience so he put together a list of great hymns and entrance/exit music for us to listen to and choose. He naturally ended up doing the stuff he was better at. I think its very important for both of you that he is involved. Its just 1 day in your marriage but it does set the scene, leave him out and he’ll end up feeling like his input isn’t wanted.

    Shoes are the single biggest issue that I have with weddings. I wore silver! I also didn’t even bother shopping at wedding boutiques, those shoes are instruments of torture. This from a woman who still puts on pointe shoes from time-to-time. Do yourself a favour and look at ballroom/latin dancing shoes. There are plenty of websites online, they come padded, strapped to stay on your feet while you are dancing, they fit for length as well as width and have customised heel sizes. They come in all shades of the rainbow, including white, ivory, cream or sparkly.

    If people don’t find something they want to get you on your gift registry they’ll get something else from somewhere else. So I’d say do what you want and other people will do what they want. Since when do people follow instructions anyway!

    It sounds like you are having fun! Don’t forget to let it all slide and have fun on your wedding day.


  3. 8 Sep 2012
    Daphne says

    Hi Lolly, love reading about your forthcoming wedding and all your insights…..very pertinent to us as we are also in the planning stages of a wedding. What a joyful and exciting time this is….. You are going to be a stunning bride whatever you do and wear! Big love. Daphne


  4. 7 Sep 2012
    Michelle says

    Hi Lauren… I say best to leave the men out of it entirely… you land up redoing things yourself anyway.. unless they are really keen to help… simple tasks only that you know you can trust them with. I HATE white shoes… get a nice pair of whatever darn colour you like and take along some comfy ones too.. make the change halfway through when everybody has seen you and nobody will know (my friend stuck on pumps at the end.. everybody was pretty ‘merry’ by that stage and never knew any different!). As for the registry, I would put all the things I really like but probably wouldnt get myself due to cost or the need to rather buy essentials.

    Sounds like things are going well for you so far, im enjoying reading all about it!


  5. 7 Sep 2012
    Mandy says

    Lauren your bridal diary has been a brilliant read . . . I think you are handling the Groom involvement in the wedding plans perfectly . . . as for shoes definitely go with what you feel most comfortable – my sister-in-law sprayed her favourite shoes white for her wedding and re-painted them after the wedding. The gift registry just needs a range of items to cover most budgets and the more expensive items will most likely be given from a collection of relatives or friends . . . enjoying the build-up!


  6. 7 Sep 2012
    Kelly says

    Hi Lauren – As long as you put plenty of inexpensive items in your gift registry to cater for those with limited budgets, you absolutely can put big ticket items on there too. You never know, a group of friends might get together and buy that expensive gift for you.

    On the subject of shoes … well I just love bright red, sexy shoes peeping out from under the white dress. :)

    PS: I hope you are going to share a photo or two with us of your big day?


  7. 7 Sep 2012
    Sarah says

    Wow, Lauren I couldn’t agree more. I am definitely not a fan of those white shoes. So many of them are rather ugly. And being a shoe fanatic I’d rather buy a fab pair of shoes I can wear again and again than a white pair that’ll probably remain in the cupboard.

    The gift question is a bit tougher. I think put a decent range on there so that it fits with everyone’s budget. Who knows maybe you have a fairy god mother (father, sister, aunt, uncle, friend) who wants to spoil you with the coffee machine. Or a bunch of friends who want to chip in for something grand!